SS Bosses Ranked (Article Submission)

(So I posted this in GenZelda and thought it could make a cool little article thingy. Do with it what you will. If people asked, I could do more of these based off of the dungeons and items of SS with the same rankings. And the pics aren't the best in this...)

This is how I ranks bosses in new games in the Zelda series:
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Pass with Honors: An exceptionally memorable battle that will doubtless become a classic moment in the series.

Pass: A great battle that pushes that goes beyond the standard

Series Standard: A good old Zelda boss; no more, no less

Fail: Fails to meet the usual standard of the series
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Now, to proceed ranking the bosses with this system!

Ghirahim

Skyview Temple
Pass with Honors
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What a shocking way to start off the bosses of the game! Having a human enemy right off the bat is definitely out of left field, and more importantly the fight was the best fight with a humanoid character in the Zelda series at this point. Dueling with an enemy who actually tracks your movements and takes according stances is incredibly exhilarating and original - definitely a classic.

Scaldera

Earth Temple
Series Standard
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Quite possibly one of the strangest Zelda bosses in terms of aesthetics, Scaldera is definitely a worthy battle. There are numerous ways to battle this enemy, and the whole concept of a rolling slope as the battleground is an original one. Unfortunately, it's bogged down by being another boss defeated by throwing bombs into its mouth and inaccurate tracking with when the sword hits its eye. Original, but a failed experiment: still better to see a failed experiment than another run-of-the-mill boss though.

Moldarach

Lanayru Mining Facility
Series Standard
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And here is an example of a run-of-the-mill safe bet boss. Fun to fight, yes, but nothing particularly stands out. It's yet another arachnid with eyes as weak spots, and its second part utilizes the dungeon item to good, if not inspiring, effect. Props for at least making it a scorpion instead of a spider though.

The Imprisoned

Sealed Grounds
Pass
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The first shocking boss of the game is a wonderful battle with a small human character, and the second is with something insanely massive. The battle with the Imprisoned is one of the most cinematic in the series, and even though it wasn't technically better gameplay-wise than Scaldera (for example), the sheer scope and ambition of the battle is enough to carry it to a "Pass" position.

Koloktos

Ancient Cistern
Pass with Honors
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What is easily one of the best general boss battles in the series, the clash with Koloktos is already one of my favorite - this is how it's done. Original style and execution, gameplay that perfectly meshes the small-scale wonder of intuitive motion control with epic, harsh large-scale combat, and a second part that makes you both shit bricks and squeal with glee when it begins (the first time I actually found myself giggling trying to run away when fighting a boss in years): a truly unforgettable boss battle experience.

Tentalus

Sandship
Pass
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Yes, that is a large image, and yes that is deserved (or more because I couldn't find anything better on Google Images). It is a testament to game design when you can have a boss as insanely awfully artistically desgined as Tentalus and yet the battle still ends up amongst the best in the series. From an introduction where you run through the ship as it literally crushes the dungeon around you, you know this is going to be a big one. Strangely, my favorite part is the physics of the tentacle-hair when you have to run through it to reach its eye...

Ghirahim Redux

Fire Sanctuary
Pass
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I'm not going to lie, I was a little disappointed that the boss was Ghirahim instead of some other new amazingness akin to the last two. However, the battle itself does not disappoint, and takes the original Ghirahim battle and adds a whole new layer of complexity to it. It can't reach the classic shock value of the initial Ghirahim duel, but it remains an exceptional battle nonetheless.

The Imprisoned Redux

Sealed Grounds
Series Standard
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Okay, it's still really fun, but having a second clash with one of the two really shocking bosses right after a second clash with one of the said shocking bosses is a little too "padding-y" for me. Even so, this second time around maintains the momentum of the first and adds some layers in the arms of the beast itself and Groose's cannon.

Levias

Thunderhead
Fail
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Ooh boy, what an intro. After that excellent jaw-dropping arrival of the corrupted, tentacled spirit whale Levias diving through the storm clouds like an eldritch abomination unleashed to the skies, it's only natural to anticipate a battle for the ages. Alas, it lasted literally 47 seconds for me.

Bilocyte

On Levias
Fail
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Okay, now I was hoping this would be the real boss - and it is! it actually lasts the usual time for a Zelda boss...too bad it's an absolutely pitiful excuse for a battle. Design-wise it looks like something from Super Metroid, standing completely out-of-place (even moreso then Tentalus). I can overlook this if the battle is fun, but it really, really isn't. In fact, it feels like an excuse to throw in some Zelda energy volleyball for no other reason than to at least have it once in the game.

The Imprisoned Redux Redux

Sealed Grounds
Series Standard
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Okay, now this is pure padding. So now it has a tail and it flies. Okay, whatever. Just let me go to Faron already so I can...collect tadtones.
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Okay, on second thought, let's just fight the Imprisoned again. It's still fun, but it's definitely getting ridiculous at this point.

Ghirahim Redux Redux

Hylia's Realm
Pass with Honors
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With the continuous fights with the Imprisoned becoming more tedious, I was worried this was going to be too. All of that changed when Ghirahim revealed his true form and the battle began. From the sheer thrill of dropping him off of those platforms (one of the coolest effects in the Zelda series, ever) to the duel, to that harrowing finale with the breakable flamberge, this is one duel for the ages, and takes the cake for one-on-one humanoid Zelda bosses, with the initial Ghirahim battle coming in third, and the next (and final) one on this list in second.

Demise

Alternate Dimension (remains unnamed)
Pass with Honors
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This is, in my opinion, the best final boss of the series, and if he wasn't upstaged by the previous battle with Ghirahim, it would probably go down in Zelda lseries legend. No more needs to be said - this is an amazing clash.